And that’s a WRAP…working with kid actors.

A few thousand dollars later, I’m thanking God that I wrapped production for my short film SLEEP after three days of shooting. Being in the director’s chair again brought on a new love for explaining action and seeing my vision through to the end. My well had been running dry since 2008. I spent countless hours in dark apartments, writing screenplays and sketches that may never see the light of day. When I wasn’t writing, I was desperately searching for work. To make a long story short, I was not making films. I saw my confidence wane. I began to consider something less creative. Then, my support system gave me an ultimatum. Either make another short film, or make another short film. Not much of a compromise. I mustered the energy to write a simple ten page script surrounding the struggle of two brothers to move past the death of their mother. The ball started rolling and it did not stop.

That brings me to now. I am happy to announce that the filming portion of my short film is completed. We shot out two locations, one in Brooklyn and the other in Harlem. I owe a large favor to Rashidah and Jeremie for allowing my crew into their homes. The two of them were troopers and they did the right thing, which was to get the Hell out of dodge while we took over their homes for ten hours each day. My crew was amazing. Several people allowed for me to call on favors in exchange for good food and no compensation. When that occurs, you automatically feel surrounded by people that are with you because they love you. This was not an easy shoot, but by the definition of producing low budget short films, it was a smooth weekend. We were working with under-aged talent, so that meant less production hrs. That is the absolute best thing about working with kids. That and also the guaranteed accolades if the actors are at least half good. Something about seeing young children go through traumatic events encapsulates an audience like Marilyn Monroe standing over steam blown from metal grating. You have to care. It is a sin not to. That is not why I wrote this story. Fact is, the death of my older brother influenced this film. I had to break that down to the actor portraying my protagonist, Rashad. The most important thing I learned about directing children is that it is almost impossible to make them imagine tragic events that did not concern them. It doesn’t exist. The most important moment of my entire shoot was when Big Southwest and I took my actor away from set and questioned him about the pain and hurt in his life. I found out that he had worked tirelessly to forget any memory that had made him emotional. I explained how I felt when I witnessed my brother suffer a seizure. While I talked, one single tear crept down my child actor’s face. It was heartbreaking. We connected on a personal level and I knew he could understand the pain. He could take that pain and relay it in his performance. In that moment, God expressed that I can do this.

I appreciate this film so much because I learned a great deal more about directing movies. I have high aspirations for the future of SLEEP but no matter what happens, this film personally saved my life. SLEEP made me better. The film made me go deeper into my psyche and recall memories that I spent eight years trying to archive. Writing the script made me cry at night. Composing the shots made me question my choices. This film made me think strategically. Here are a few things that I learned on my third outing as a film directing.

1) Stay true to your message but you do not have to marry the execution. I learned a lot more about trust. This was a lesson that I first put into practice while shooting my previous short film, Underbelly. With SLEEP, I became fully collaborative. I held meetings with my Director of Photography where we spoke about the mood of each scene and what I wanted to convey. Then, I also communicated heavily with my art director about the look of every single room. What each color meet to every single character that we’d see on screen. That was so important to her, and it made me go back to the script to flush the characters even more. With that, the look changed. I had to meet with the DP again to explain the change of the palette. I had never thought so much about my stories until making this film. I storyboarded the Hell the out of this film and when we got on set, those boards went straight out of the window. We were working against time because of child labor laws. I had to know exactly what needed to be shown and why, so that I could reconfigure certain shots to get what I needed in the allotted amount of time. Quick on-set decisions that a director must make.

2) Casting is just as important as shooting. During the actual production, I learned every single question that I should’ve asked during the casting sessions. There are certain physical needs when playing specific actions and that affects the casting. Also, casting child roles is so delicate. It is extremely important to understand a child’s past and how that correlates with your story. It seems that for children to have greater imagination than adults, they need to feed off of past experiences much more than seasoned actors/actresses. The best thing for me to have done was to understand the most important memories that each child who auditioned had. With those memories, could that child connect with the story being told.

3) Being honest. I believe that my honesty with the kids pulled better performances from them. I expressed when I was disappointed. There is something about the word “disappointment” that really kills a kid’s morale. For some reason, that word makes them want to do better. I don’t know what it is about that word. It’s like a passive way of saying I hated what just occurred. It is a whipping to their self-esteem. That sounds crude and manipulative but it works in a harmless way.

4) Always be directing. That’s not to say always give direction. I learned that the kids appreciated quiet moments when I wasn’t in their ear. Well, one of them at least. The younger actor really enjoyed talking about the scenes thoroughly. My older actor wanted to process the information for himself. Other times, he just wanted to be a kid. I had to find the medium where the shoot was as fun for him as it was for me. When I needed to give the kids a rest, I’d speak with my DP about upcoming shots. I’d peek at the rooms for which we’d need to shoot for the next scene. I take quiet moments for myself and snack on a pretzel while I get my thoughts together so I could give more thorough direction.

5) Assume nothing. This is a funny one because there were times when I felt like my message wasn’t getting across and the situation was played as if I had never mention things that I surely did. Such as telling people upcoming plans then when it comes down to putting those plans in practice, you’re being told that certain things were never expressed. You come off looking crazy and incompetent at times, but if it’s a battle worth not fighting, the best thing is to appease the situation. Keep it moving so that it can continue to move. Also, and as it should be, no one knows that script better than you. There were moments where I asked to run the scene and half of it was done incorrectly. The most common thing that is said is that you did not communicate those actions. That may be true because as the writer and director, I knew that the actions were on the page. In my mind, I’m thinking these people are crazy because that is exactly what the scene says to do. Then I stepped back and thought, well the fact of the matter is that metal rods are sticking from every which way, people are putting lights here and there, spaces are cramped, scents are mixing, emotions are running high, stomachs are growling, and just maybe, mofos have forgotten what was written on that page. Assume nothing. Explain every single thing that you are looking to see happen so that time isn’t wasted on a bogus rehearsal.

6) Don’t settle for mistakes. When the heart told me that it wasn’t comfortable with continuity mistakes, we had to reshoot a scene on a different day. On this particular day, we had no time for surprises nor mistakes. But I just had to redo this one scene. I knew that it wouldn’t play in the edit. We had made a big continuity mistake because a prop was missing. It weighed my heart heavy. I said that if we worked this re-shoot into the schedule, I’d work extremely hard to condense a shot or two toward the end of the day.

7) Speaking of which, always be reading that script. I learned that I needed to reread each and every scene before shooting said scene so there could be limited mistakes. At the top of the first day, we had decided to start with a large scene that called for expansive coverage. I felt like I knew the scene like the back on my hand. We began shooting and saw the action so many times that I stopped looking at the script. I placed the book down somewhere and continued directing. Then I started remembering certain things that were supposed to happen and that affected how it had to be shot. We had to rethink how certain shots would cut with others and if we had crossed the matching line. It was almost a mess. As much as I thought I knew my own writing, I needed to revisit the words to make sure every prop was accounted for. With this, comes the script supervisor. That person MUST have an eye on everything that is occurring. We were shooting in cramped spaces at times and would not invite our mistress of continuity in on the action because there was no room. Since the budget was small, I did not have a wireless monitor for her to view in situations like that. I counted mistake after mistake and spent time fixing those problems. I covered myself on most of the issues but that was a headache. For all parties involved I’m sure.

8) Budget your film. Then, add a thousand dollars to that budget. LoL.

9) Having a style to the film really helped make the shooting of the vision go smoothly. When I shot Kareem’s Next Education, it was about what I thought had to be in the frame. I was using wides, mediums and close-ups with no real reason for doing so. I did not know the language of the camera at all. With Underbelly, I was much better. There was still not much of a desired aesthetic. There were scenes that I knew should be intimate and others that were tense but no real language. I can honestly say that there is still no specific Donald Conley aesthetic but my language had gotten much better with SLEEP. When I would build with Matt Mitchell, I explained that the walls should be caving in on Rashad. He is really looking to escape his sin. If he saved his brother from the sight of their dead Mother, Rashad could repent. As he starts to lose the battle, the lens should be so tight on him that it would be hard for the audience to escape his tension. I’m able to have these conversations now and that means so much to me. I want to have a fluid connection with the language of film and maybe one, I’ll have my very own aesthetic.

10) Seek the truth in every decision. I am telling a very human story so the choices must feel true. I did a lot of research on seizure activity and causes. I asked people what that should mean for the character of Mama. I asked my niece and nephew how they would react. I realized with directing, comes much study. I saw an interview of Steve McQueen about the inspiration of Shame and he spoke about going to clinics and holding dialogue with actual sexual deviants. That made me understand that I had to know these characters like I know my own family. Rashad and Vincent were my children. Mama as well. I gave them life and I asked the performers to add their truths. To make their own decisions and to allow me to mold those decisions into fitting with the grand scheme of the project. The writing had to be true. The emotion had to be true. The framing had to be true. There are moments right now where I wish I had asked the actors to make certain decisions that feel a bit more correct. Someone told me that it’ll always be that way. For the future, I’ll know to consider every truth in the detail.