Middle of the Map

That beautiful view is the city I love.  And I am ready to move on.  I love Chicago like I love water in 90 degree weather.  I truly do.  The city of hard hope is at the epicenter of who I am and everything that I stand for.  The fact is that what I’m after and how I envision myself getting it doesn’t exist here for me.  I feel a bit disconnected from the artistry that I was once a part of and I’m here in transition.  I am keeping myself busy while here but my financial plan of escape has yet to pick up like I mapped out.

I am currently producing a feature film, directed by Ytasha Womack.  That has kept me active in regards to the language of cinema production.  I am grateful for that.  I desired to shoot a short film here in Chicago and I am still playing around with that plan in regards to my financial setback.  Do I invest money in the project or invest everything in the exodus?  I am leaning towards using every dollar I can accumulate into a migration plan.  That leaves me with no new project as I change scenery but I am in desperate need of a transition.  Yes, Chicago has its own artistic hub.  Yes, people are shooting film here.  I don’t believe the investment market is here because Chicago was never a large production center.  The films I see being produced on an independent level are working on headache budgets.  I consider them headache budgets because it becomes a headache to put something of substance together because the money is funny.  And it’s a shame because there is so much talent here but Chicago appears to be a very local market.  Local and loyal, which is beautiful, but I desire to work at a different capacity.

This is just a little air off of my chest.  I have been getting some great comments about the feature film that I penned and am working on a few lab applications, especially the Sundance screenwriters’ Lab.  This would be a great blessing and confidence boost as I am feeling like I exist on an isolated island.  I chose this path of course, so there are no complaints.  Just me constantly checking in with myself by way of absolute honesty.


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